The cosmos slapped my face, via a drunk driver who almost rear-ended my cab at almost 1 AM this morning.

After watching the car swerve all over North Avenue, my cab turned in to Mindanao, seemingly losing it. Then not 20 seconds after the cab halted at a stoplight I heard a crash behind me, only to see a Toyota rear-ended by the same maniac driver, not 5 meters away from us. With every single car at the stoplight we were all sitting ducks, the asses our cars exposed for the driver pick from and crash into.

Got home and told Dave about it. Told him I was shocked and shaken; I didn't tell him how much, though.

I think I smoked about 4 cigs afterwards.

Got to see the movie Crash with Dave two Saturdays ago. I was shaken, even more so than I was by The Great Raid, which we also watched earlier that afternoon.

I shall not summarize the movie, for I encourage the readers to go out there, shell out money and watch it themselves. I swear on whoever's grave that it will not disappoint.

Allow me, though, to reflect.

On the first level:

How tragic, the thought that racism spans across the globe, with every race being guilty of it. If you think about it, it's actually true. Racism is not just about oppression; any form of snap judgment made towards a particular individual with the basis being his cultural background, is racism.

I mentioned that every race is guilty of this act; it's true, and the movie reminded me of this. An African-American will brand a Caucasian of branding him; that person therefore tags the Caucasian based on what he knows about Whites: prejudiced. It's a vicious cycle, this hasty judgment.

Knowing this, one has to wonder if all of this is rooted to anything other than the historicity of the issue. Of course, it would be the basis of the whole thing, but one has to consider the fact that this is something that has gone beyond whispers and verbal insults; I am sure that we all know what hate crimes are.

A scene from the movie shows the character played by Ludacris (yes, the rapper) stating that people always connect the Blacks to violence. Why is this so? Not delving into the validity of the statement, I know it is safe to say that Blacks have had their contribution to crimes of violence. But let's suppose that a Black person robs a convenience store. If that man has kids who eat only once a day, we would have to think twice about whether or not he's robbing the store just for kicks. And on a more relevant issue, let's say a Black person kills a White person, seemingly out of sheer spite; he has a gun and he hates White people. We have to wonder why he does this. Is this just a mindless act, or is there something that underlies it? Maybe he's scared. Maybe he's angry not at Caucasians particularly, just that one individual. Or maybe he IS angry at all Caucasians. But whatever the reason may be for this, the fact that all these are possible hints at the notion that these acts are mere reactions.

THEN we go to the second level:

Exactly why do we lash out at people, and how often do we do it without even knowing it? This is something that goes beyond racism; you lash out at people no matter what your color is, no matter what THEIR color is.

It works two ways when it comes to this, I think:

We throw shit at people because we don't want our backyards messy. We throw the shit that has been festering for some time in our own lawns. And we just can't take the stench anymore. In other words, we lash out at them because we can't lash out at our own lives --- and we desperately want to.

Another thing is that (and this is just me surmising) we let ourselves "crash" because it is through this act that we find contact (and for some people, this is the only contact they can attain). This is where will come in those people who act like assholes but ultimately depend on others towards whom they act as assholes. And upon saying this, I start to wonder: during the times when we as individuals crash into each other, do we really unknowingly collide, or do we throw ourselves out to them?

Upon laying down these two thoughts, I (again) begin to wonder about how we as humans deal with pain. Do we run away from something and in the process smash into each other and start beating each other up, or do we completely block out the source of this pain and just start running towards whatever we may find out there? Do we try and escape FROM something, or do we try and escape TO something? And how often have both happened?

Looking at my personal stuff, I for one can tell you right now that it's not an easy task, telling the difference. I have blocked things out more times than I can (or care to) remember, and in the process started running with no direction whatsoever. But then again, maybe the fact that I block things out is my way of escaping FROM them. So maybe I do both.

Maybe it's the same with every other person. And here comes in another point of the movie: how we judge people without really knowing how things really are with them. There are some people who encourage judgment to be made towards them because they wouldn't want others seeing how they really are. They take shelter in these fake facades as if they were their skin, and to strip them off would be to expose the soft muscles and spill the guts out. And of course, some people pride themselves with, well, pride -- for one reason or another.

I think I've gone on about this movie for too long now, so I'll shut up Just watch the movie, and in doing so, remember where you are in your life, and how you are as a part of other people's. And in the process, should you find traces of what I have just mentioned, please do not feel guilty, because it is what we do. It is an inevitablity because there sits at the pit of our stomachs this weakness that makes us real. We can afford to throw out the years of practice of manners and decencies and eloquence, just to have one moment to scream.

We crash, and we scream, and then we weep, and then we go back to the flow of life. It's what we do, no matter who we are.

Currently feeling: thoughtful

Panatang Makabayan
Iniibig ko ang Pilipinas.

Ito ang aking lupang sinilangan.

Ito ang tahanan ng ating lahi.

Ako'y kanyang kinukupkop at tinutulungan
upang maging malakas, maligaya, at kapani-pakinabang.

Bilang ganti,
diringging ko ang payo ng aking mga magulang.

Susundin ko ang mga tuntunin ng aking paaralan.

Tutuparin ko ang mga tungkulin ng isang mamamayang
makabayan at masunurin sa batas.


Paglilingkuran ko ang aking bayan nang walang pag-iimbot
at ng buong katapatan.

Sisikapin kong maging isang tunay na Pilipino

sa isip

sa salita

at sa gawa.

So where does this come in now?

[from the website www.overheardinnewyork.com]

Old Italian lady #1: Your cat's gonna get hit!
Asian Lady: Wha?
Old Italian lady #1: Your cat: it's in the street! Someone's gonna run
over it!
Asian lady: Huh?
Old Italian lady #1: Your ca--
Old Italian lady #2: She doesn't care about the cat. Those Orientals, they eat cats.

*
Black lady #1: I'm still waiting for that African guy to come back.
Black lady #2: You mean the guy with the crazy kids running all around? Those kids were wild.
Black lady #1: Well you know those people, they aren't used to being indoors.
Black lady #2: Yeah they used to running around in the jungle.

*
Old lady: Your dog is beautiful!
Young lady: Than---
Old lady: It's terrible what they do to those dogs in China. I won't even say it's awful. . . Chinese people don't even deserve to live.

*
Girl #1: Oh my God, I watched American Treasure last night.
Girl #2: What, no good?
Girl#1: Oh my God it was horrible.
Girl#2: The trailer made it look kind of cool.
Girl#1: That's what I thought too. But then you actually watch it and there's nothing about American currency.

*
Hobo: Can you offer a contribution to the United Negro I Didn't Go to College Fund?

*
Suit #1: I had to dig a four-foot trench last week.
Suit #2: Why?
Suit #1: Well, we're putting a waterfall into my swimming pool.
Suit #2: That's why they invented Mexicans.

******

I don't mean to dabble on very sensitive subjects, but I'm thinking that this is one of the reasons why that city falls in deep shit.

Going from the thousands to the millions for each venue, not to mention the other 2 billion from around the globe watching the live feed, the crowds that gathered at the Live 8 concerts seemed to verify the impact of the concern Bob Geldof (among others) wanted to put across. The concerts simultaneously held in four different continents (with Africa jumping into the mix at the last minute) blared out that in this case, the message was as strong as the medium.

Or was it?

Airing yesterday its special on the issue of African poverty "Inside Africa", CNN brought to the attention of millions of viewers a clearer picture of the very concern for which these concerts, as well as the Global Call to Action against Poverty (GCAP) and other campaigns, have been fighting.

It was during a coverage of the London Live 8 concert the question of the crowd's awareness of the primary objectives of the concerts was raised. Surprisingly there were some attendees only aware of it being a free-of-charge, Woodstock-ish concert, with the biggest names in music performing. However, optimistic statements were given, saying that the course of the shows was mapped out to address the crowd about the concerns of the Live 8 campaign, and those who came to the show not knowing about the concerns, were made known of them.

*****

Africa, for which the campaign was launched, followed up with their own Live 8 conert in Johannesburg, simultaneous to the other concerts around the globe. The concert was added as a response to claims of the shortage of African performers at the shows.

"What do participating musicians know about Africa?" asked Susan Outa, a student in Nairobi. "How do we know whether half of them have even visited a single African country?"

The Johannesburg concert managed to gather up a few thousand people, which was a complete turnaround for the expected total turnout. This was mostly due to the lack of means of communication in the region; those who were able to witness what was termed "the world's biggest concert" were left puzzled by scenes of "white men with guitars." A significant number of Africans were unfamiliar even of the name Bob Geldof, and were only slightly made aware of the significance of the entire campaign.

"I don't know who Bob Geldof is," said Edward Romoki in downtown Johannesburg when asked what he thought of the man behind the concerts. "But people are speaking about poverty and there is plenty of that in Africa -- maybe a concert like this can put Africa in the news and change things."

Maxwell Shirima, a 25-year-old who makes around $5 a day selling oranges at the side of the road in Tanzania said he had no idea there were any concerts being staged to help Africa.

"I haven't heard anything about it, but anything to help us is good," he said.

The Johannesburg show was the second to kick-off the global events, with Tokyo being the first.

*****

Staged a few days before the G8 Summit and Glenseagles Hotel, Scotland to be held from July 6 to 8, Live 8 was also to kick-off The Long Walk to Justice which is meant not only to catch the attention, but pressure the leaders of the 8 most powerful nations in the world (The United States, Great Britain, Japan, Russia, Canada, France, Germany and Italy) to eliminate the debt of the poorest countries in the world, most of which are in Africa. Simultaneously, the campaign pushes for the doubling of aide, which goes hand-in-hand with the rebuilding of the nations that are on the extreme poverty line. Meant to be the masses' medium for their concerns, it was stressed to not be a follow-up to the 1985 Live Aid, which was also organized by Geldof. The campaign pushes to speak to the leaders, with the message being that the rest of the world will be waiting for them to make the right decisions.

As what has fervently been pointed out by Geldof, the Live 8 concerts were not for charity, but for justice. Other organizers of the campaign held on to their stand of the movement being about equality, and not financial aid.

To be led by British Prime Minister Tony Blair, the G8 Summit has been identified as one of the remaining (and currently the biggest) hopes for the elimination of world poverty. However there has been some pressure with the hesitation of US President George W. Bush, with him claiming that the increase of trade with Africa will be a more acceptable plan.

"The stakes for Africa at this meeting could not be higher," noted Dr. Paul Zeitz, Executive Director of the Global AIDS Alliance. "Blair should reject Bush's excuse that 'Africa cannot effectively use additional resources,' a view clearly contradicted by the latest UN assessment."

Moving more towards the awareness of the issues than being a major solution for them, Live 8 was meant to act as a battering ram at the doors of the Gleneagles Hotel, not intending to be a disruption for the G8 summit, but a constantly-screaming issue, the voice for which is that of the entire world.

*****

Every breath you take . . . we'll be watching you.

[sung by Sting during the Live 8 Philadelphia concert, directed towards the G8 leaders]





Sources:
www.alertnet.org
www.globalaidsalliance.org

live8

Currently listening to: the echoes of Live 8
Currently watching: hopes soar
Currently feeling: determined

This is about exposure.

I understand that, upon consideration of the social framework that has been ordained upon us, what I am about to delve into is that which is left for only select groups of individuals to entertain and explore. Yet whether you, the reader, are aware of it or not, I am part of those groups. And I am here to tell you now that I am not one to circumscribe such a sensitive and probably controversial topic to individuals who can "take it." People can take it; most just choose not to. I want you to. I at first had my apprehensions with regards to my involvement with something such as this, but after shifting my position and opening up enough, I found that it is something I would want to introduce myself to fully; and I have.

This is the type of thing that has been hidden under multiple layers of shrouds ever since the wretched notions of censorship and social consciousness were instigated. It is ironic, since the core subject of these photographs is the very thing that social consciousness calls for. I would like you to visualize your face on these photos, instead of the faces that are shown (or not shown), and witness how this process of displacement works. I cannot predict the very effect that it may bring about, but if you would allow it, it WILL make you shift in your seat. Maybe make you sweat a little. I shall walk you through every photograph.

Let's see you try and take your eyes off the screen.

A man from a Malawian village in Africa. A place crumbling under famine. People from this area, children included, eagerly await the coming of winged termites that they will moments later snatch out of the air and toss in their mouths. 1

Africa, still. 2

Liberia. A 9-year old wounded by mortar rounds that landed in a Monrovian refugee camp run by the American embassy.3

A volunteer in Libera helps bury 66 bodies in a hurriedly-dug mass grave, as peacekeepers drone in the distance.4

African children huddle as they make do with their portions.5

A toddler living in conditions that force him to literally eat crumbs off the pavement.6

A famine-stricken Sudanese child (female) crawls towards the United Nations food camp a kilometer away.

A vulture stands by.

This is a Pilitzer Prize-winning shot taken by photographer Kevin Carter. The scene he had captured led him to flee the area rigth after, the same scene that many speculate was what later on led him to take his life. Along with his body was discovered his suicide note, which read "The pain of life overrides the joy to the point that joy does not exist." 7, 8

Another photograph taken by Kevin Carter.9

I write this post neither for it to be put across as a call for action, nor as katharsis for the injustices and inequalities that I see; neither as rebellion against the countries mentioned above, nor a mere feat to add a bit of humanitarian flavor to my webjournal.

I write this post with selfish intentions; I had my concerns, and I placed them here.

Let those who cast these things away go on with their lives. I stand here as only one person aware of the limited reach and effect of a weblog, especially this one. But it is here that I choose to voice out my feelings.

This very post might make me seem like an overly-concerned individual who is nothing but frustrated towards a society she wants to change. If that is what you think, then you are very much mistaken. This is my spot on the world wide web, and these are my thoughts. Writing is my craft, and it is my right and responsibility to make use of this craft for good.

So what significant "good" do I expect this post to do? Honestly? I have no idea. But to whoever is reading this, if I have touched you in any way with the things you have seen, then let that be good enough. If I have opened your eyes to issues you have never taken a good look at before, then I am proud and grateful. If I have, however, done nothing, then it is perfectly fine. Because as I have mentioned, my intention was to voice out my concerns. And the photos you have seen verify the fact that my concerns are real, and these things ARE present not just in the countries mentioned, but in other places.

I would like to reiterate that this is not a call for action, but thinking about it, I wouldn't mind it being seen as one. Let this post move people. Let this make people think. Let this make people see. Let this make people realize that there ARE issues other than the ones they choose to deal with. Let this make people realize that other people are dying, if not already dead, for reasons they had no control over. Let this post make people understand that it goes further than countries not having sufficient finances. Because that issue in itself is worsened by the fact that nothing is being done. People are left to waste away, then rot away, then get buried in mass graves (if they get buried at all).

This is about exposure. Exposure of these issues that call for social awareness as well as human compassion, and exposure of the part of myself that not many people get to see.

So how do you like it?

CITED SOURCES:

1 "Why People are Still Hungry in Africa." Herald Tribune. 15 July 2003. 25 May 2005. http://www2.ee.ntu.edu.tw/~b86163/Weblog/july182003.htm 2 photo taken from http://churchofsaginaw.org/churchstory/crossroads.htm (photographer unknown)
3 Benson, Robert. "Inside the Pulitzers." American Photojounalist7 June 2004. 25 May 2005. http://www.americanphotojournalist.com/news.php?post_id=145
4 ibid.
5 photo taken from http://mars.walagata.com/w/boonchee/poverty.jpg
6 Villanueva, Lorraine. "IMAGES THAT WILL TOUCH YOUR HEART...." E-mail to the author. 22 May 2005.
7 ibid.
8 "The Ultimate in Unfair". Flat Rock. 29 April 2005. 25 May 2005. http://flatrock.org.nz/topics/odds_and_oddities/ultimate_in_unfair.htm
9 ibid.

live8

Since it's a Friday, I am again getting ready for my drum lessons with Tito Guy (who should be here any minute).  Things have been going extremely well.  I think that I'll be having Part 2 of my exhibitions lesson.  It's an amazing feeling, when you're about 20 seconds in to an exhibition: your mind suddenly goes blank, you stop thinking about which drum to hit with which hand.  You just find yourself pounding away, as if on automatic  pilot.

And of course, Tito Guy has never gone easy on me.  Which is good, because I wouldn't really like it if he did.  And because of this, every single lesson ends up with me having cuts in my hands, if not a few areas of peeled skin.  Tito Guy says I should be proud to have them, for they are what may be considered the battle scars of a real drummer. 

I hear him outside now. 

Oh my hands . . . Not complaining though! Hehehehe!  Not at all!

Currently feeling: excited

SUNS!  COME OOOON!

Yeah ok at first I went with these guys to purposely go against someone I know (hi Dave! hehehehe!), but if I were to be honest with myself, I would say that I really AM going for the Phoenix Suns at the Western Conference!  Nash dominates, for crying out loud!  Can't deny that!

Screw Horry and Manu and every other Spurs player, and WIN ONE! I canNOT get another post-game phone call from Dave with him doing nothing but laughing!  NO MOOOOORE!!!!!! 
 

Currently feeling: win one, come OOON!!!!

. . . just in case anybody was wondering :D

Jeez, I haven't updated in a while.  So busy with work (among other things, yes, but mostly work).  It's a wonder how I find time for myself.

I'm writing again   Thank the stars.  I guess my theory was right, regarding my poetic process:  poems require a couple of months in between.  Why, I still don't know.  But hey, at least I'm in the middle of writing one, which is what matters!

I have to slow down, I think.  I've been doing too much, even during the times I'm supposed to be relaxing.  And then I go and whine about headaches and anxiety attacks.  Hehehehe.  Just take a break, Chee. 

Wish I could do that, but unfortunately, the randomness of my schedule just doesn't allow me to.  I wish I could get just two full days of rest.  For some people, that's called a "weekend".  Really?  Can you get that in stores?

Ah screw it, just do what you gotta do!  Hahahaha!  Rest will come, one fo these days :D